October 2017

It has been widely reported in the press that the MCC are considering putting a roof over the home of cricket at Lords. Oft touted as a progressive bunch fearless when it comes to innovative design and technology, could I point out to the MCC that the idea was first mooted in this parish several years ago after a particularly successful indoor season for several of the Longparish sides.

Keep up MCC,

What LCC idea's would you like to lift next? A Media Centre perhaps? or and Underground car park and  fountain with nymphs? 

Presentation Evening

Was well attended and held both indoors and out at The Cricketers Inn to whom we give many thanks.

The food is best glossed over, but seemed to be more shambolic than previous years. If anyone else wants to have a go or come up with a more palatable alternative, don't be a stranger.

Yes there, were speeches, and of course the raffle. Each were of limited  interest and don't merit much mention, so on to the gongs:

William de Cani picked up the 1st XI batting cup for his 653 runs at an average of 65 and Jack Levy collected the 1st XI bowling cup for his 26 wickets.

Jamie Blackmore is the Longparish 2nd XI batsman of the year with 319 runs at an average a smidgeon short of forty and Father Barry Blackmore ( a relatively recent ordination) pipped Chris Clarke, Harry Samways and Callum Giles for the 2nd XI bowling cup.

George Kousseff claimed the Longparish 3rd XI batting honours for his 224 runs at an average of 74 and Christian Dawson narrowly beat Nathan Smith for  the 3rd XI bowling award with 22 wickets,

Scott Sturt claimed the Midweek 20/20 Player of the Year award and James Bevan is Longparish CC's Fielder of the Year for 2017.

Scott Sturt swiped further silver with the LCC Young Player of the Year award, Michael Taplin took the Indoor Player of the Year and Callum Giles is LCC's ;Young Indoor Player of the Year.

William de Cani collected further silverware, this time on behalf of Luke Benzing who was the recipient of the BSi Cup.

Neil Bonathan wasn't in attendance but dispatched Chris Clarke to collect the Sprague trophy on his behalf for his many services to LCC and Ben Gardner was declared Players' Player of the year.

The Champagne moment and subsequent bubbles went to Gary Taplin for catching a ball while falling over (a feat first accomplished by Albania's favourite son, Norman Wisdom in The Night They Raided Minsky's- give him a google kids he was very much the Jack Whitehall of his day - Norman Wisdom, not Minsky)

Thanks were given to umpires, scorers, coaches,  tea people, ground people, play people and everyone else who gives so much of their own personal time to life at Longparish CC, before proceedings drew to a merciful end.

The Ground

The man on the machine with fast moving parts behind has attacked the square, removed lots of rubbish and applied the best part of two tonnes of Surrey's finest loam. Blackie and the spirit of Kenny are pleased.

Thank you to everyone who turned out to put the old place to bed.

www.alibaba.com

In a progressive move with an eye to opening avenues in all corners of the globe, LCC have entered the export business and are pimping their cricketers around the world. Matt Jackman and Dan Pomroy were instrumental in establishing  links with Nepalese cricket last year and Harry Martin is currently in China embedded deep cover in efforts to establish a Chinese 20/20 competition. William de Cani is currently turning out for South Yarra CC in Melbourne and is soon to be joined by Alex Coetzee and Dan Pomroy in negotiations over a possible "ground share" with LCC in 2018.

Progress on the possible ground share can be gleaned at www.yarras.com.

Harry's progress with the embryonic  "Big Bash" in the East is unavailable online as the joints and joists of the Chinese internet are formed from different pieces of wood than our own. .

Go well the Yarras! (I believe this vernacular is current in the Antipodes)

LCC Survey

Data analysis from previous surveys has proved inconclusive and Clubmark and ECB Wallahs have once again  been on. Previous surveys don't meet requirements and we must persevere until they get the answers that said wallahs want to hear.

So here goes with a final (take note ECB & Clubmark Wallahs) yes FINAL,  club survey. .

1: Why?

2: What?

3: Where?

4: When?

5: Whither?

6: Warum?

7: Wo wohnst du?

8: Wie komme ich am besten zum burg?

9: Warum mache ich diese dumme Umfrage?

10: Why, Why, Why?

Answers on a postcard to LCC Data Analysis department, Room 4.5A Stable Cottage, Bransbury, Barton Stacey, Winchester, SO21 3QJ

This survey has been brought to you by the letter W and the numbers 1 to 10 and all the enthusiasm one would expect when presented with such a box ticking exercise.

Christmas Draw

The briefest visit to a garden centre or supermarket will confirm that Christmas is imminent.

The Longparish Christmas Draw and Hundred Club Draw will take place on Wednesday 13th December and we need prizes so here goes with the perennial appeal:

Anything will do. This year we have increased the speed on the conveyor belt and narrowed the viewing window in order that sub standard Fayre will pass the contestant's eyes at a greater speed.

In date, out of date, frozen or thawed, garish or just downright odd, we'll take it all because it'll be a blur on that fast moving  belt.

If you have a prize for the Christmas Draw please let Madam Sec know julieasturt@aol.com.

An appeal for everyone to purchase tickets will follow next month.

Hundred Club Draw - November

Thank you to everyone who wrote in with their font of first choice to herald the winners of this month's hundred club draw.

A Mr Y Gagarin of Kirzhach writes:

On the 12th April 1961 I was strapped to a prototype rocket in the Russian Steepes with a packet of sandwiches and a hip flask of vodka and fired into space. I didn't know it at the time but it was the first time that this had happened to a human being. Space is a long way away and the radio on the rocket stopped working after a few minutes. Shorn of Steppes FM I was forced to make my own entertainment for the hour  or so that I was away from earth. Sitting on a tin can far far from home, planet earth did indeed look blue and there was nothing else to do but sing Russian folk songs,  I know it's a letter awry in the spelling but the Font Kalinga always reminds me of how I filled in time while orbiting the earth waiting to return home, eating sandwiches, drinking vodka and singing

Kalinka, Kalinka, Kalinka my dear,

Your name in the whisper of space I can hear.

Shazbot Nanu Nanu Yuri, Kalinga it is

£35  Rachel de Cani         £15  Ray Smith         £15  Jan West